Something must grab an agent or publishers’ reader attention immediately. This can be an unusual use of language, a unique voice, a startling action, a bit of dialogue, an active description of setting.
Something must grab an agent or publishers’ reader attention immediately. This can be an unusual use of language, a unique voice, a startling action, a bit of dialogue, an active description of setting.
Thinking of a short sentence or short paragraph that would grab the reader's attention.
Stephanie
I also agree Adrian, I find the opening sentence very important, at it also have to catch you (you, the writer). I was used to read the openings of every novel I found, to see all what you can try, and it was a good for me as a writer.
One of my favourites, is from J.G. Ballard's novel, Crash, subtly catching :
« Vaughan died yesterday in his last car-crash.»
And the, after this first sentence :
« During our friendship he had rehearsed his death in many crashes, but this was his only true accident.»
S.A. Barlow, I really love the second opener.
some openers from my work...
Butchers
'Grendal surveyed the scene he had created with some amusement. The man with him swallowed hard and looked sickened. Some of the maggots had become flies, it had not taken long for them to spread their wings.'
The Introspective World of John Macaloon
'The fridge is on the brink, I think it has been on the brink for some time now but its only been in the last few weeks that its sounded like a cat with haemorrhoids trying to learn to fly. More than once I have turned round and watched it, wondering if its going to burst into flames, or perhaps wap out a machine gun and start shooting. I think the fridge is stressed, It must be stress, with an intermittent electricity supply, an over active front door and the singular rotting potato as a constant companion I would be stressed, I have no idea how it copes. I half expect to wake up each day and see that its gone on strike and supports a “Im a fridge god dam it! My life has value!” sticker. Not that I will have it for long. Its very likely that I will be moving soon and then I wont have to worry about the stupid dyeing white goods any more. '
The Shades
'She could not quite understand her own horror. She knew that she was shaking, that she had been terrified, yet the feeling of those emotions was so adrift from her previous imaginings of them that she found confusion rained supreme.'
The Snake Pit
'Clarence drummed his fingers on the polished dark oak desk. He could see his face in the shine, smell the varnish and with a small delight he looked at the sticky fingerprints he left as he touched it. Grendal didn't seem to notice, to see such things as noteworthy was beneath him.'
Dante
'His feat fell on the dry stone, the sky above him a brilliant deep red. He could hear the humm, feel it through his toes. The sound of his own dry breath the only immediate, close, noise. He was late, and he was angry to be so. It had been his fathers fault, he could not rouse the man from his drunken slumber and once he had he was berated by the usual lack of enthusiasms for the morning worship. The old man had promised he would go, he had promised. '
A Fools Progress
'There was not a cloud in the sky above the South-West corner of Ireland, Joining Earth; It had been an uncommonly hot summer. It was just before nine in the morning and the sunlight streamed through the old brown sack curtain. It played in the dust and smoke and wound its way down to shine on Clarence’s eyes. He cursed it for waking him.'
As you can see I am too descriptive in my opening scenes, but i'm enjoying myself. nothing quite ready to show publishers but I feel my writing style is getting stronger. The top extract, Butchers, is the one I am currently writing and its much easier to develop it than previous MS's