how do I show more and not tell.....

Kat,

Expand sensory details. Helping your reader feel like he or she experienced the event with you is the key to a great autobiographical essay, and it's easier to accomplish with sensory details. Sensory details are descriptors that appeal to the five senses (sight, sound, smell, taste and touch) and provide your writing with a sense of immediacy. For instance, "It was a windy day" is a lot less effective than "The cold, salty breeze scraped over my face."

If you're having trouble developing sensory detail, try closing your eyes and imagining how the event felt, focusing on one sense at a time. Do you remember any strong smells? Vivid colours? Unusual tastes?

Don't rely on adverbs. Adverbs (such as "she walked quickly") should, as a general rule, be avoided whenever possible because they weaken writing. Focus instead on adjectives ("cold" and "salty" in the example above), nouns ("breeze" instead of "wind") and verbs ("scraped") instead.

Hope that helps :)

The best thing you can do is read good examples. It's hard to explain this but you will know it when you read it.

Try reading Edmund de Waal's "The Hare With The Amber Eyes" it's a biography of his family, but it reads like a novel. It's an excellent example.

Without reading a sample of your work, it is hard to tell. But this is a common problem for a lot of writers. If you are saying things like "It was a lovely day" or "He was angry", then this is what is meant by telling and not showing.

Instead of saying "It was a lovely day", describe what it is that makes you think it is a lovely day. Are there no clouds. Is the air crisp, or warm and balmy. Is there birdsong, as on an early spring day?

And instead of saying he is angry, show us his expression. Are his hands balled into fists? Is he tapping his fingers on the table. Is he glaring at someone?

These are probably lame examples because it is early, but I think it gets the point across.

Also, don't go too much the other way and make things over-descriptive. That is another mistake too. Don't be twee. Be real.

Hope this helps and good luck.