'Was' or 'Not Was'

by Jonathan Hopkins
21st November 2012

Here's a question for English pedants (like me!).

"(He) turned towards Elinor with what he hoped a winning smile..."

"(He) turned towards Elinor with what he hoped was a winning smile..."

This is Napoleonic period military fiction. I wrote the first: editor thinks the second. Bearing in mind modern readers' sensibilities, what do you think - 'not was' (active but needs more effort) or 'was' (passive but easy to read)?

Replies

Dor, you're right - it depends on context. So by the same token 'Zombies', despite being funny and easy to remember, won't always work, Ergo, it's not a 'rule.'

Although to judge by other English grammar 'rules' it probably is one. Sort of ;)

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Jonathan
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Jonathan Hopkins
22/11/2012

Use of the word "was" doesn't automatically make a sentence passive.

The rule according to Rebecca Johnson, USMC culture and ethics prof: if you can insert the phrase "by zombies" after the verb, it's a passive sentence.

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Dor
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Dor Armitage
22/11/2012

Thanks to all for the comments - looks like the editor wins. I've had basically the same response elsewhere :(

Thank you, Victoria. I agree completely xx

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22/11/2012